wipingallout

To lose someone important...someone close to you. Is it like losing a limb? A missing part that is unfairly taken away from you- never to be fully replaced ever again? Akane can construct those questions in her head. She can look up websites in a matter of few seconds and weave over all its possible symptoms and effects but the loss itself is...its human.

She thought the human soul attached to her code would help her understanding all that. Why can't she?

Any way you could've saved them - and then it hurts all over again because even if you could have, that doesn't change the fact that they're gone.

Gone.

Her mind went back to Zenkichi, remembering the look of utter defeat in his eyes when Akane had stormed out of the place.
Then she had felt like crying. She wished she could cry to relieve herself from her heavy emotions- instead all she was left was this gaping emptiness.

This...void.

Dad...

Her sigh hitched as she heaved a deep breath and considered her words.

"If you ever had the option to run into them again...would you tell them what you just told me? About a different life? The memories that you shared with them?"

"If I had a chance to run into them again..." Hamuko sighed, resting her chin in her hand and thinking it over. That's a hard answer...

"...I think it depends on who it is. I think for my parents, it's been so long - I'd want to tell them how much I grew, how I never forgot them and wanted to make them proud. If it was Minato, I would've wanted to spend time with him and make him smile. If it was Ryoji, I would probably... tell him a lot more of these honest feelings, because that's the sort of relationship we had, and he would understand my feelings better than others might. But I know for each and every one of them, I would want to tell them that I always loved them, and that never went away."

Akane heaved a deep breath, tilting her head as she parsed her words carefully, eyebrows drawn together as she tried to log away what Hamuko was saying. Right. She lost her parents at a young age...her friends, whoeever Minato and Ryoji were- whoever they were they had a place in her heart. Their memories that she carried long after her passing.

"You sound like one of those protagonists at the end of a cliche manga," she ended up sputtering instead- feeling awkward despite her deliberate stare. "Though cliches are a cliche for a reason. I am a little jealous."

"By that logic Wolf and I did love each other. As family. When we were human," she hummed as she clutched her chin. "Love. I don't know if I can even describe it anymore...as an AI, I don't think I can love my dad anymore, can I?"

"Aigis had an artificial intelligence, and she felt love. Aigis being the Anti-Shadow Weapon that joined us in SEES... she felt romantic love, and platonic love. There's nothing that would keep you from feeling it, Akane, I'm sure of it."

She never had a doubt in her mind about that. Not with how deep and close her bond with Aigis had been - there was never going to be a robot or AI that Hamuko thought couldn't feel things.

"There might be a lot of other emotions happening at the same time that make it feel less clear? You have every right to be angry and upset about things, too. That can make it a little harder to understand your own feelings, sometimes."

"Interesting."

That would just make her even more faulty and glitchy then originally expected no? That she can't even differentiate between too many emotions or there were too little for it to hold any weight. Just buttons that triggered its way when her systems experienced a glitch, hell was she even upset by her memories or was that just a coerrelated reaction? Did it even matter?

"Er- sorry, we are going in circles again, huh? I think I am getting a grasp of what you are trying to say. Thank you for hearing me out anyway," she leans back in her chair.

That said...the Ichinose issue.

"Getting back on track- I did find some really concering behaviours exhibited by both EMMA and the Maruki I have read about in comments and posts. Not the current Maruki but like...just in general. With his powers and his capabilities. Even with no EMMA he easily fills in the gap."

"Ughhh," she leaned forward- burying her head in her hands as she messed it up in frustration, "I don't know what to dooo. What if someone else attacks her?"

Edited 2025-04-29 22:32 (UTC)

"It's okay to retread ground on something a few times to parse through it," Hamuko nodded, though she listened to the switch in topic back to the psientists.

If someone else attacks her... hmm.

"Would you or Zenkichi be willing to step in and stop an attack on her if it happened? Not fight to defend her, exactly, just... de-escalate a situation. That might shift her perspective out of paranoia, maybe?"

Akane blinked back at her. "Yeah um, no? Hamuko-san with all due respect- I can easily predict a scenario where Wolf will simply watch from the sidelines and pretend nothing happened."

"...I am not thrilled to be her bodyguard either." Sorry Hamuko, she does not understand where you are getting at.

"Hmm, well-- I'm thinking that if someone wants to attack her, and you or Zenkichi can talk the other person out of trying to do that... I think it'd give her less reason to rely solely on Maruki. Since the problem right now is that she can only feel safe with him, right?"

Plus, Zenkichi caused the problem in the first place...

"If she sees you two stopping any violence from happening, even if you guys are doing it self-servingly since you made a deal - that ought to make her at least assume she isn't about to be ambushed at every waking moment. So maybe she would stop hiding away in Maruki's Palace and other people can talk to her?"

Okay...talking other people out of said violence. It's a noble act, one that she and her father would have done in a heartbeat for anyone else. They promised exactly that on their message now pinned on the main conspiracy board. It was their job.

She looks up from her otherwise frustrated state, hair slipping between her fingers as she shook her head.

"I am not mentioning any of this to Wolf," she pushed stubbornly, her father's fierceness peeking through. "He will never be on board with it and its just going to waste both of our time."

Even as her hand drifted to the side, bored as fingers tapped against projected screens to open flutter again, trying to find patterns of when exactly did people start tolerating or opening themselves to Maruki's presence. If any. This will take a while.

Or maybe...

"Maybe I should put up a warning post..?"

"Oh, good idea! On the board in the Velvet Room, maybe - and it doesn't have to single out Ichinose either, if it's something about avoiding instigating violence? Or you could clarify them. Phoenix has notes about being friendly, too, so it wouldn't be completely out of place."

Akane's lips parted, grateful for the approval. She's never made decisions outside the scope of a usual mission and to work on an idea that didn't lead to a clear objective...she wasn't all too confident about it.

"Since she is helping us, I can point out that we will be supervising her. It's our primary objective at the end of the day." She rests her chin on her hand. "That is...if working on EMMA's andidote doesn't give her notes to work on a stronger version once she's back in her world."

Or I genuinely start hating the very ground she walks on, she doesn't say.

"Good thinking! And that'll imply that people should talk to you or Wolf about anything dangerous they spot her getting up to, if she actually does do that. And... well, maybe the more she gets to know people here, maybe she'll change her perspective? Sort of a... preventative rehab, thing."

"A preventative rehab, thing."

Akane couldn't help but actually chuckle at that- despite the seriousness of the topic. "Or babysitting. Adult-sitting?"

At her own correction she groans. "Damn- I forgot we are dealing with adults here. It really makes you think, doesn't it?"

"Yeah... not everyone is really... socialized right the first time..."

"Hey, Wolf's a bit of an exception-!" She teases. "I am kidding- I did yell at him for nearly an hour after making me go through a full stack overload. I swear I thought I couldn't even percieve shit for a moment with the way how fast he found her. Or how fast she contacted Maruki- right before my eyes."

"Yeah, Wolf definitely deserved to get chewed out. I don't... really blame Ichinose for calling for help immediately, because if she actually is completely helpless then obviously you would freak out and try to find the safest place."

Understandable... but the whole situation was a fucking mess.

"But if she gets into a bad feedback loop with Maruki because he's the only person she can trust... urgh... they're going to make each other worse..."

"...I wouldn't say completely helpless," Akane shrugged as he lowered her legs to the floor. "She did rip out the microphone of her phone without damaging any other parts. Plus at the end of the day, no matter how advanced me or Wolf are- she's an artificial intelligence researcher. She just needs the tools..."

And with that, what Hamuko said was the cherry on top.

"Exactly."

An EMMA and Maruki hybrid...the mere thought of it...

She taps her foot against the floor. "Think I should mention Maruki in the warning post as well? Or would that just make this situation more- us against the world kind of mentality?"

Edited 2025-05-01 00:49 (UTC)

"Hmm... I think leave it vague. Maybe answer if anyone asks privately."

Tampered with her phone to not be traced and recorded... and proficient with technology. Hmm.

...The video recordings of the SEES members that Ikutsuki was undoubtedly watching came to mind. Made her skin crawl, a little.

...

"She's gotten the warning, I think at the very least we should stay alert and give them a chance to prove us wrong."

That makes sense. She doesn't want to rally someone who can apparently manipulate time along with someone proficient enough to hack into her against her at the end of the day. Besides retracting away to a safe spot, what else will she be able to do?

"You’re right," Akane nods. "I just figured I should think through all the scenarios before I go about making a public announcement. It needs to serve its purpose and make our intentions clear from the get go so we can safely deploy the antidote against the EMMA of our world."

And there it was, the more artificial side to her. Always quick to sort out its purpose.

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